“Saw 3D”
“This one has a GREAT setup: a dude who is claiming to have survived a Jigsaw trap in order to cash-in on the true crime
“Kuffs”
“1992 Christian Slater doing Zack Morris as a private security guy pulling a Taken revenge kind of thing should totally work. It kinda works. “
“Midsommar”
“Chris Hemsworth takes his girlfriend to a music festival featuring Florence and the Machine as well as a brief set by Orville Peck. They should
“A Nightmare on Elm Street”
“”You know what would really update this character? Making him a child molestor.” -One person that a bunch of people who make bad decisions listened
“I See You”
“Twisty and kind of fun, although I wish the POV switch didn’t make you watch the entirety of the first 30 minutes twice ALL THE
“They Came Together”
“Um: “Since 2014, Rudd and fellow actor Jeffrey Dean Morgan have been co-owners of Samuel’s Sweet Shop, a candy store in Rhinebeck, New York that
“Coherence”
“A normal dinner party becomes awesome. 10 out of 10, I wish every dinner party could be this interesting. So maybe you’ve destroyed the fabric
“Saw VI”
“By this point, the most tortured thing in Saw is the timeline. Though this movie has some fun elements, it can’t stand on its own,
“The Halloween That Almost Wasn’t”
“I understand the witch’s demands for the most part, but wanting to be on the Transylvania merchandise in place of Dracula? How does that make
“Miami Vice”
“This is one of the few movies I walked out in when I saw it in theaters. My memory of it is that there was
“The Imitation Game”
“I think this movie tried to be two movies. It tried to be the more introspective look back at society and how we treated gay
“Saw V”
“This is a very weird turn for the series. On one hand, the Jigsaw portion is pretty solid. The lesson to be learned is actually
“[REC]”
“Wish I’d seen it in ˜07 because it does suffer a bit from existing in the post-found-footage pile. Found footage seemed like a great thing
“Saw IV”
“Saw 3 kind of pulled off its retcon of Saw history in a pretty unexpected way that kind of makes sense, and then Saw 4
“Saw III”
“This one is off the rails, but in a good way. I think this one probably best balances the franchise’s desire to trace everything all
“The Taking of Deborah Logan”
“This is a non-sexual taking, for what it’s worth in terms of whether or not you’re more or less excited to watch. “
“Birdman or (The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance)”
“If I had to select a movie soundtrack to play whenever I did stuff, like walk through a room, it’d be Birdman. That shit was
“Rubber”
“This one felt to me…like a movie that was made for people to write stuff about it. Which is fine, but at the same time,
“Saw II”
“Well, it’s early August, which means spooky movies are on rotation in my house, baby! I’m going for it, a Saw Watch 2023. Now, I
“Clerks III”
“I’m a Kevin Smith Stan, so know that. I’ll make a light critique first: The movie hits its emotional high late in the game. Dante’s
“Father of the Bride”
“I feel like this movie would be extra good if you watched it when you were 17 and then again when you were 37. I
“Alien³”
“I’ve bumped this up a star, but I get why I never dug this one: It feels like Roger Corman’s Alien. Let’s do this in
“Day of the Dead”
“It’s a goodie, not my favorite of the trilogy, let’s be honest, Dawn is the best, anyone who says otherwise is just trying to be
“Last Action Hero”
“While watching this with my partner, Poonmaster Flex (her anonymity-maintaining online nickname), Flex commented that she kind of loved this because nobody makes movies like
“Vertical Limit”
“What if you had to climb a mountain in order to save your sister from the weather? Would you bring a bunch of bombs? If
“M3GAN”
“First of all, thanks to this movie for having the courage of its convictions and not returning a result on letterboxd when I type “Megan,”
“I Am Mother”
“TELL YOUR CHILDREN NOT TO WALK MY WAY. Well, the About box on google spoils this movie within ONE SENTENCE, which is pretty efficient, 10/10,
“Hackers”
“Hackers: Better as a memory than a movie. Before I rewatched this, it was like a 3-star, maybe 2 of which were for irony. It
“The Lost City”
“This is in truth a 2-star film, BUUUUUUUT the goat’s real name appears in the credits, so extra star.”
“Barbarian”
“I think this movie is made more interesting if the facts about Justin Long’s character are not confirmed in the bar scene. If there’s ambiguity
“Black Mirror: Loch Henry”
“There’s something here about our true crime obsession, but I’ve mostly softened on that whole thing. What I DON’T care for is people talking about
“Black Mirror: Joan Is Awful”
“It was good and all, BUT it has that issue where at some point, you don’t want to watch the same thing twice. You, as
“Black Mirror: Beyond the Sea”
“Easily the best of the season, best concept, taken to its logical, but extreme end. “
“Black Mirror: Mazey Day”
“A Tales from the Crypt script fell through a timewarp.”
“Black Mirror: Demon 79”
“While I can appreciate the sentiment, I thought we’d be run out of Trump stuff by now…sigh…”
“Hotel Transylvania”
“I’ve now watched two things with Selena Gomez in it. Only Murders in the Building, in which her character is named “Mabel.” Hotel Transylvania, in
“Stake Land”
“Very solid apocalyptic/vampire movie. It doesn’t bring a whole lot that’s new to the genre, BUT I’m seeing it…13 years after it came out, so
“The Good Nurse”
“There’s nothing bad about the movie, the problem is that the movie has a description. From the description, you not only get the gist, you
“The Babadook”
“I don’t know what it is, but I’m just not feeling the lady falling apart maybe because life is hard and maybe because the supernatural
“Jeepers Creepers”
“Weird how this one works. There’s a psychic who pops in to explain everything, but then she doesn’t really explain anything. There’s a monster reveal,
“American Factory”
“It’s a political movie, and I have no problem with that, however, I think the trailer and other things sell the movie on the idea
“Dave Made a Maze”
“Amazing design, the only problem is you see 90% of what the movie has to offer in the trailer. And yet, I think the trailer
“I Care a Lot”
“I’m all for a movie where there are no sympathetic characters, and I Care A Lot goes out of its way to clear the board
“Smile”
“*referee whistle* Looks like a call of too many it was just a dream moments on Smile with no indication or way for viewers to
“Jackass Forever”
“One day I’m going to write a story about a 69 year-old Johnny Knoxville type planning and executing his final stunt, which will surely kill
“The Suicide Squad”
“I made the same mistake with this one that I did with Guardians of the Galaxy: I heard the hype too many times before I
“The Black Phone”
“Solid horror flick, and it’s got just enough supernatural stuff without going too deep, plus, and this is huge, the supernatural elements aren’t overly explained.
“Worth”
“You know how you watch a movie like this, and it’s good, but it’s not like you’re cheering at the end? Everyone’s great in it,
“Nomadland”
“I liked this movie better when the main character was Randy the Ram. But seriously, this is torture porn for the Oscar set.”
“The ‘Burbs”
“This is my all-time favorite twist on “The real monsters is us!” “
“This Is Where I Leave You”
“This one, like the book it’s based on, didn’t hit for me because I felt like it was grounded in reality, but it needed just
“Spiral: From the Book of Saw”
“Saw was in a place in 2021. It couldn’t keep on as it had. Even the diehards were like, Bro, we’ve mined the original trilogy
“Kurt Vonnegut: Unstuck in Time”
“There’s a lot to love about this movie, a lot of heart to it, but it didn’t connect all the way where I think it
“The Hatchet Wielding Hitchhiker”
“The first 2/3 of this kind of worked for me in a perverse way. I was like, “See, this is what happens when you try
“Bad Words”
“Little bit of a late entry into the “holy shit, that adult just told a kid to fuck off” genre, but I’m also the one
“Big Trouble in Little China”
“As Movie Night continues through 2023, it didn’t take us too long to get to Big Trouble In Little China, a much-loved movie of mine
“The Net”
“I’m suspicious that the Sandy Bullock bikini scene and the TWO futzing with beautiful hair scenes were added later once someone was like, “Eh, is
“Scott Pilgrim vs. the World”
“If you liked this, but then only sort of liked the ending, read the comics. I’m telling you, the ending to the comics is VERY
“The Happening”
“Over the last couple years, we’ve decided to culturally reevaluate anything and everything. This may have started with reevaluating the place of pop music and
“Monty Python and the Holy Grail”
“Why aren’t there more movies where we give a bunch of goofballs some money and they do whatever goofball shit they want? Disney should take
“Home Alone”
“My favorite character is probably Chris Farley in the SNL parody where Macaulay throws him over a table. Nobody crushed a folding table like Farley.
“The Void”
“If the FPS Dusk were a movie. I suppose it’s not all that helpful to review something by comparing to a more obscure thing. But
“The Visit”
“M. Night does a good job with these. His Hellevator movie (whatever that was called) was pretty good. If he’s got like a limited budget
“Leprechaun 4: In Space”
“This is one of those terrible movies that’s more fun to talk about than it is to watch. It’s the hard thing about bad movies:
“Leprechaun 3”
“As part three of the 4-part Leprechaunathon for Halloween, this was the sag point in the series. It sounds awesome: The Leprechaun ends up in
“Leprechaun 2”
“Leprechaun 2 has most of the charms of the first, just not quite as much. I guess there’s a little more lore or something, a
“Leprechaun”
“This is an earlier work of an actor who would go on to be quite famous. I’m of course referring to Mark Holton, aka Francis
“Dead & Buried”
“Maybe this one is a little more like a Twilight Zone episode, pulled out like taffy to stretch to full length, but that taffy still
“The Mist”
“This is one of those “learn nothing about it, do not google it, just go watch it” movies. Just great stuff. A totally underrated Stephen
“Panic Room”
“I’ve never felt so empty as I did after this movie showed me 1. I have nothing of value high enough that a panic room
“Don’t Breathe”
“This might be a good political ad, kind of like the ones I’ve been seeing around here (Colorado) about legalizing hallucinogens. The ad is all
“Wish Upon”
“Here’s a review I wrote for a library newsletter. Enjoy! Let’s say I told you that your library card is a wish-granting device. Not in
“Us”
“Well… I have complicated, mixed feelings about this one. On one hand, like Get Out, I appreciated the movie that was a bonkers-as-hell horror flick.
“Fair Game”
“The movie that answers the question: is it worse to cast supermodels or professional athletes? The answer is complicated. You want to watch a movie
“Clue”
“This is an ex’s favorite movie, so I’m morally obligated to give it no more than 3 stars.”
“Frankenstein’s Monster’s Monster, Frankenstein”
“I’m not sure if this meets the technical definition of movie and I kinda loved it.”
“The Blob”
“Any movie that has the guts to brutally skeletonize a child is an A+ for me.”
“Hocus Pocus”
“This movie, like The Goonies, is one I would like to go back in time and show myself when it came out. Because I don’t
“The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies”
“I think this one…felt like we could’ve lengthened the first two by half an hour each and got all this in within two fairly long
“The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug”
“Gandalf really needs to learn how to delegate tasks so he’s not always leaving everyone and being all, “Sorry, bros, I know you’re about to
“Kedi”
“I’m a cat person, but… There’s this line from the description: “the most mysterious and beloved animal humans have ever known” This is why punctuation
“Mean Girls”
“Just rewatched this last night. Let’s talk about the biggest holes in this movie, which aren’t very big. 1. Why is Lindsay Lohan introduced to
“Impractical Jokers: The Movie”
“This was the last movie I saw in theaters, just before lockdowns in 2020. It’s now August 2022, and I still have no plans to
“Creep”
“There’s a problem with this type of movie that’s not Creep’s to solve, but it remains unsolved: When I’m watching a movie called Creep about
“Prospect”
“Starts with a great premise: What if the gold rush happened in space? And then it takes that question and says: “It’d be exactly the
“A Quiet Place”
“You know what drives me nuts about this movie? “Women are so tough, she births a baby IN TOTAL SILENCE.” You all know this movie
“Upgrade”
“Imagine you could maximize your brain’s potential. Why are people so into that? Wouldn’t, like, 5% more be pretty good? Also, maybe brains are like
“Circle”
“I watched this while catsitting for a cat I truly loved. She passed away. Did her demise and this movie have any relation? Absolutely not.
“The Expendables”
“Jason Statham plays a character named Lee Christmas. We’ve got Christmas Jones in James Bond. Lloyd Christmas in Dumb & Dumber. Using a name search
“Predator 2”
“The Sega Genesis game was a B+. This is my system for rating movies that have been rated and viewed plenty already. At least I
“Predators”
“In the theater, when Adrien Brody came out topless, there was a noticeable titter that rolled through the audience. The guy was ripped, but it
“Day of the Dead”
“What if we made a movie, but like, it’s not your dad’s Day of the Dead!? Nick Cannon is no Joe Pilato. Or Mena Suvari
“Land of the Dead”
“Can people stop saying this movie is prescient? Like it invented the concept of rich people and poor people? “It’s more relevant now than ever!”
“28 Weeks Later”
“…if they’d moved this over one franchise to the left, released it as Land of the Dead instead, everyone would be a lot happier in
“RoboCop”
“I give this 5 stars even though it spawned an NES game that forces you to kill a bunch of dogs on the first level,
“Ravenous”
“This is my go-to for horror that’s genuinely great and generally underappreciated.”
“The 40 Year Old Virgin”
“Watching this movie in your 20s: Oh, his life is so empty and sad. Watching this movie in your 40s: That looks quite peaceful.”
“Swordfish”
“I give this movie 5 stars because Halle Berry is topless and for no other reason. I have no defense for this and will make